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3Episodes
Category: Comedy:Improv

A weekly podcast wherein we freestyle ‘reviews’ of books we haven’t read, with tenacity, ingenuity and palpable desperation. We only judge a book by its cover!

April 25, 2019

17 · Jerry Sohl’s Nuclear Neo-Fascist Burning Man

Vampiri della Morte Cover ArtUrania returns! Amid the nuclear fires of post-war fascist Italy two avant-garde music acts vie for dominance over the future of European pop music, making unlikely friends and allies along the way.

Geiger-punks vs X-Ray Anarchists!

K tries to remember "that other vampire writer" and invents "La Bamba No. 5". Khaki needs to get his notes in order, and dwells on his time stuck in the glue traps.

Bookmarked passages:
Halfway between hooloovoo and octarine, was Homer color-blind? (yes), Byzantium, Italian Jack Skellington, simplified geography, Bobina the ghoul-monkey,  wolves are a keystone species, Romanian is like dyslexic Latin, K's cool electric skateboard, podcasts aren't just for hearing folks, Latin is explicit, H. R. Giger-counter,  Redhead from the Marvel Universe, Red Guy from Cow and Chicken, Monarch from Venture Brothers, Killface from Frisky Dingo, Vampirelli, Strix Squadron, Asterix and Obelix in Corsica, Mickey Mouse Gloves.

Selected quotes:

"I'm talking about Geiger, not Giger – the Swiss gross sex-robot artist."

"The cheese? No, the city in Switzerland."

"His body is a zentai with bones painted on it, but his head is an actual skull."

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April 18, 2019

16 · A Very No-Nipple Era

"City on the Moon" by Murray Leinster
Reviewed (but not read) by Khaki & K

City on the Moon Cover ArtIn which: Donald Atticus, an Earth journalist inspecting an absurdly-domed City On The Moon, becomes embroiled in inter-colonial conflict.

But could hehave a secret agenda of his own?

...Yes. yes, he does have a secret agenda you got that, right?

K quotes a Ukrainian colleague. Khaki warms up to Chewborka and invents the word 'hemitorus'. And a rival reviewer writes in!

Bookmarked passages: Display prances, Fallopian and Eustachian tubes, methane-negative, Shackleton, Terry pratchett Stage Script, Potemkin Village, Pripyat and the Woodpecker, Señor Wellingcroft, every prepper's fantasy, Uranium Glass, Guy Noir, Bauhaus vs Rococo, Motorball from Alita, SCUBA regulator, buckminsterfullerine.

"There's no holes in you yet.
– Well, no more than usual."

"And so Bugs Bunny is single-handedly responsible."

"Yes, you can do it like that, if you want to do it stupid."

"I shave, it's in canon."

"He barely understands what’s going on; he’s just game – he doesn’t understand that he’s on Team Baddies"

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April 11, 2019

15 · Let’s Rod ‘Em

Operation: Damocles by Oscar L. Fellows
Reviewed (but not read) by Khaki & K

Operation: Damocles Cover ArtIn which: K is hip with the kids' lingo and teaches Khaki lots of Space Things. Khaki explains his "photographic memory" and forgets the word "photo".

Bookmarked passages: introducing Guinevere, no lasers in space, everything Icarus, the graveyard orbit, useless code names, Fortynite dances, is a jetpack a spacecraft, the secret city of Delaware, Camp Sandyballs, Navajo verb categorization, a three-way fuster-cluck, LSD all over again, agent Patroclus B, not a lot of Sapphic myths, hover-converted C-130, more than tungsten rods, the Gay Belt, Velibraraptor breeding program, a good Greek number 

"No, but the camera person doesn't have to be on the on the moon."

"That's just bad spacemanship, really."

"It's very... how to put it.
– Stupid?
Cinematic. It's very cinematic."

"I'm going to tell Kerbal Space program you don't know that off the top of your head."

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April 4, 2019

14 · Kicked In The R’s

"The Fourth "R"" by George O. Smith 
Reviewed (but not read) by Khaki & K

The Fourth "R" Cover ArtIn which: Rabble-rousing Rodrigo raucously rejects the ruling ranks and rocks out with rebellious renegades to reignite the revolution!

Bookmarked passages: Glue Traps Part II, unused Genie bottles, constructivist art and Farscape, top-seasoning of an Executor Class Star Destroyer, Thinking Cap, Cathar gnostics, Taekwondo.exe, past tense of reading, three languages in a trench goat, George R. R. R. R. Martin, the Fourth Plinth, louder for the people at home, a Good Mind Number

Selected quotes:

"I just have a note that says PIRATES, exclamation mark!"

"I especially liked the lion gentleman with the large..."
—"Assets?"

Find CoverMyAssCast on TwitterGmail and the good old-fashioned web.