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Category: Comedy:Improv

Amid the towering stacks of a mysterious Library we desperately ‘review’ books we haven’t read — with tenacity, ingenuity and love. We only judge a book by its cover!

January 31, 2019

5 · After Eating the Missionary

"The Drums of Tapajos" by Colonel S. P. Meek 
Reviewed (but not read) by Khaki & K.

The Drums of TapajosIn which Khaki distracts K to converse directly with the readers at home, and we fall deeper into the madness of arguing passionately about a book we haven't read. We wisely pull the ripcord before it's too late. The spoiler warning is therefore entirely superfluous, but hey, at least it's there!

Bookmarked passages: the remains of Decimal Dewey, a Touch o' the Ol' Syphilis, Bill the Pony vs Artax, Gaslighting Our Canadian friend, Tezcatlipoca, Drummer Jokes.

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January 24, 2019

4 · Riddled with Johnson’s Tubes

"WASP" by Eric Frank Russell (or maybe Eric, Frank and Russell) 

Reviewed (but not read) by Khaki & K.

Wasp book coverIn which we meet beloved but problematic literary legend Blake Whitecock, delve into the geopolitical reality of the Falklands Cold War, and pitch a movie version with two Anne Hathaways and a Halle Berry.

Bookmarked passages: Burning Fahrenheit 451, Which One Is Enid Blyton Again, Nubbly Bits on What I Think is the Jet, Fantastic Lesbian Subtext, Scramjet Tracheae, Teniente-Coronel Jones, Llama vs Llama, Animals We Hope Would Run Out of Air

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January 17, 2019

3 · Snake Starts with an S

"Deryni Checkmate" by Katherine Kurtz (or maybe the other way around?) 
Reviewed (but not read) by Khaki & K.

Deryni Checkmate book coverIn which we discuss the names of medieval armour, whether 'scallop' or 'scallion' is a better job, and fail to escape the 'Explicit' tag by the skin of our teeth.

Bookmarked passages: Not a NYT Bestseller, A Lot Happening on the Front, Point at Egbert, Cuirass or Tabbard, Retroactive Chamber of Secrets Ripoff, Teetering on the Prepuce, The Milk Boy Dafydd, and Seven is a Good Snake Number.

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January 10, 2019

2 · Asymmetrical Twenty-nine-pack

"Dagger's Point" by Anne Logston 
Reviewed (but not read) by Khaki & K.

Dagger's Point book coverIn which we accidentally started inventing a pretty good book to argue about before we remembered what we were doing. Oops! 

Bookmarked passages: Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, Sphinx cats' bronzed oiled skin, Towers or toars, 4-foot tabby lynx, Bob Ross?, Glaive on a stick, THE TUFTS, The Segue Award 2018, StormFangBloodMoon II,  a wild idea for a podcast.

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January 3, 2019

1 · A Little Bump of Lunar Regolith

"Aliens From Space" by David Osborne 
Reviewed (but not read) by Khaki & K.

Aliens From Space book coverIn which it begins! Cover My Ass is a podcast where Baffling Books Are Reviewed (But Not Read!) starting with "Aliens from Space" by David Osborne.

The cover almost makes us wish we'd read the book...

Bookmarked passages: 45-caliber bookworms, the Democracy of Rocket Equation, Is Frank Herbert dead, Earth is a big pumpkin, "it gives the fingers stain", they're not Zorglabians, all the cool aliens and their genitals, snorting is the way to go, all the way to the appendix, and sometimes a handshake is a handjob.

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